I hate people who are not serious about their meals. -- Oscar Wilde

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Bowery Diner

Om Nomz Hero Note to Self: The Bowery Diner insults every Jersey Diner.

tl;dr/note: suggest not coming here with so many other options within cripple walking distance

Mathieu Palombino's Motorino is one of my favorite places. Everything from the food, service and every aspect of this restaurant is on point. The opening of his newest venture, the Bowery Diner, I was in high anticipation however, after last night, I will most likely, not be going back here again. There are such things as an off night, but last night was far from beyond an off night, it was like a catastrophic failure. I was so unsatisfied with the meal that I did something that I have never done after a meal in New York: got pizza. 

Pistachio Milkshake- good

I guess like a colonoscopy, lets ease into this. The place is done up like a Pleasantville 1950s diner and the retro look stand out on the Bowery and I liked it. As the name says, it is a Diner and had all your usual diner fares but of course, being New York, they got a bit more than just flapjacks, omelets and burgers with whelks escargot style (which by the way, I did not get but sounds like something the Joe Beef guys got going on in there book, not starting anything, just putting it out there), cocktails, choucorute. Bowery Diner is a clash between a Bouchon and the American Diner. 

Brussel Sprouts- Okay

I stopped in here around 6 and the place was about a little over half full and decided to get a quick bite. Being a diner, I needed a milkshake (boozy ones offered as well), and I got the pistachio flavored one. I ordered the Bowery Special and a side of Brussel Sprouts because you need to get some veggies in some how. 

The good which unfortunately is not going to take to long:

1. the milkshake is hard to mess up and they were thankfully able to do this sucessfully and sadly the highlight of the everything. Also gave you the excess milkshake that did not make the cup which is always good
2. brussel sprouts was cooked with bacon and got the flattop treatment and had a nice char
3. the pickle that came with the burger. 

Okay, we eased into it, take a deep breath, try to relax and bend over:

Bowery Special- bad

the Burger the Bowery Special was topped with a pastrami patty done up in house, a beef patty, greyere and brown mustard. A nice rift on a a Rubuen. Apparently cooked to order is not really done here and I only had the choice of medium rare or medium. That is it. When I asked for the burger to be rare, I server, some dude with a Bro'd out fauxhawk ignored my clear request for a rare burger and when I insisted on a rare burger he reacted the way you should not react or respond:

faux grimace

"uhh we don't do rare here"

When I inquired why not here is another way to not respond

"we just like, don't"

This should of been my sign to leave. Like Napoleon marching into Russia and seeing snowfall, should have paid attention to the sign, and just turned the hell around.

After taking my order and bringing my milkshake. This would be the last time I would see my server. Oh, except when he cleared my stuff. 

The burger was a sad affair. the burger patty was mealy and apparently cooked to order did not matter because as dim as the lighting was, that was cooked beyond medium rare and closer to well done and "why are you abusing this meat". It lacked any beef flavor, mealy. The pastrami patty was just okay and was a step above the beef patty. the bun to meat ratio, even with 2 kinds of meat in it was clearly off and the bun was just "ehh". The fries which clearly took up the most real estate on the plate were greasy and limp. This was just a sad plate. The damned clown, and easily the fast food Ginger makes a better burger. I wanted to complain, but unannounced to me, I apparently had SARs or a contagious disease because no one was to be found. I had to flag down the hostess, just to get a side of mayonnaise.

Finally when my server made a cameo and cleared my plate, he did not even question the barely touched fries and the burger that was left, and if he did not really care, then I guess I just stopped caring either. 

This is probably the biggest negative review I have ever written so far in this blog and I hope there is only going to be limited to a few. This place just failed on so many levels and compared to his other venture, Motorino where the server actually questioned me of all was alright when I left pizza bones on the plate it does not seem possible that these two places are opened by the same person. The website to the Bowery Diner has a picture of a diner car being pushed over into the water which in truthfully ironic, because this is my exact feelings on this place. 

Bowery Diner 
241 Bowery
New York


1 comment:

  1. Whoa, Hero - maybe you went on a really off night...When I went to The Bowery Diner it was a decent meal (weird that the milkshake was our only letdown).